The real story starts now

Not mine exactly, but another B-Body station wagon (Caprice)

A few days ago I started working on a 1989 Buick LeSabre. A station wagon, to be exact. I adore these GM cars, but not for mechanical or performance reasons. Probably from the days of riding in one all the way Up North to Sleeping Bear or decorating one for the 4th of July parade, or first learning to drive on one. Who can say?

Anyway. I have one. And it's mine. It will be beautiful. It will be glorious. It will not have vacuum leaks, bad brakes, an oil leak, sagging suspension, and a host of other maladies to sap my liquid assets (spoilers: it will). 

Luckily, it doesn't have many power features or body damage, and the rust is minimal. A new paint job ($$$) and it'll look like new. I actually like that it doesn't have a roof rack or "luxury" features like power windows or anti-lock brakes (What happened to pumping the brakes and driving slowly in the snow? It worked for our great-grandfathers!). I think the most modern feature is the cruise control, which I haven't had the heart to function test yet.

I digress. The first, easy thing I wanted to look at was the air intake gasket over the carburetor. Yes, CAR-bur-rey-tor. When I first changed the air filter (the old one was super-gross, btdubs), I noticed the nigh-complete disintegration of the old gasket. I later tried to cut a filter from some gasket paper nonsense, mostly free-hand with part of the old, stretched gasket as a template. It fit. Kinda. With help. Anyway, it's not perfect, but I'm hoping it does the job. I actually haven't had a chance to drive it since then because of other work I'm doing.

The brake warning light came on (future-tech!) and I wanted to check all the joints and brakes anyway. So into the garage and onto the lift it goes. More on the lift later.

Long story short, both rear wheel cylinders leaking, shoes worn almost completely, and front discs are pitted, but not terrible. The master cylinder was half empty from the leaking rears. I started by removing all the great, fun stuff that drum brakes conceal.

I was actually stoked that they came right off without a lot of grunting or heaving on my part. The car was used for a business (funeral home. Rad.) with relatively low miles for the age and garaged most of its life. I guess that says something about how much you love your vehicle. Or that the brakes were just that bad.

Once the drums were off, they didn't look terrible, but the insides were a mess. I think they'd been leaking since the drive back to Michigan, or had recently started when the warning light came on. Plenty of muck and lots of fluid contamination. To the parts store!

I came back from O-Reilly with new pads, fluid, hardware, and cleaner. I also came back with two of the WRONG wheel cylinder parts. I also found out that nobody knows how to turn brake drums anymore. Also that my drums were technically out of spec and not able to be turned, but that the guy at the store across town who could do it did me a favor anyway. Great staff at that location. A nice, old, Santa-bearded guy that owns a Skylark works there. 

Totally not my fault that I got the wrong wheel cylinders. The LeSabre V8 they have in the O-Reilly database isn't a station wagon, which I think makes the big difference. Bolts in the wrong locations and too small. I did a search for a comparable model, an '89 Pontiac Safari wagon and the right part came up. 1" bore wheel cylinder, everything lines up great! Gotta love 'dem GM B-Bodies.

Between getting these new parts and the next day, I should impart a word to the wise regarding the Ranger brand QuickJack. I know it says it right in the manual, but do NOT, repeat, NOT put the lifts at any angle other than parallel, or as close as humanly parallel possible. Bad things will happen. The laws of physics dictate the path of motion the vehicle will travel, and an object in motion will tend to travel in the same direction as the force that acted on it until it encounters another force. Basically what I'm saying is, the car will twist on the jacks if they're pointed in a V-shape. I had this experience, not realizing that they were so far off kilter that they weren't parallel anymore. I was focused on getting the lifts under the car on the frame without realizing that the points I was using weren't parallel to each other on the other side of the car. I'm not happy with my oversight. 

When I realized this, I was starting to do an oil change since I was waiting for the parts the next day. I happened to look at the jack blocks with my head under the car and said, out loud, "Fuck me, that shit doesn't look right."

Nearly an hour and a half later, with the missus helping, we tweaked, floor jacked, and traditionally jack-stood the car until I could get it back on the ground safely. 

If I'd known then what I know now, I would have put all four wheels back on the car (they were all off at the time) and lowered it easily to reposition. Instead, I dicked around and nearly broke something, including myself. My heart palpitations grew three sizes that day.

Anyway, tonight, we got the parts and I learned a few things about how not to change brake springs. Again, with the missus helping, we jammed the shoes back on, slapped the adjuster plate and screw in, then finagled the springs onto their bolts. Later this evening, I looked up how to actually use the brake spring tool I own... correctly...

Tomorrow it's on to the driver's side, armed with new knowledge. A job that has taken over 48 hours on the passenger side will probably take only 30 minutes this time. Life is a cruel teacher, giving the test before the lesson.